Bodyweight.
Is a thing for me since ever. If you are interested in a race report, scroll down.
According to my parents, I was not always chubby. But as far as I remember, I was always one of the non-ideal-body-shape people in school. I always carried this blob beneath my navel that I imagined being baby fat, I never got rid of. I was never really overweight. BMI was always fine. But I always felt fat. Not being fast and agile on land added to that feeling of clumsiness. I tried to accommodate in that by moving less and less and making a show getting out of a chair etc. With my beginning Asthma at 8 years, I stopped playing soccer (there was a time where I was the main goalie of my team of 6 year olds, no running, you know…) and took up swimming. The clean, humid air allowed me to push myself without getting out of breath. As with everything, I did this to excess, was in the pool around 7 hours a week, added weight training end the like. I was never fast enough to win anything of importance, but I maxed the swimming thing out for me and was happy with chasing my own PRs. As we know from seals and whales, moving in the water is not really worse with a few additional kg of body fat. But I got nasty nicknames and my girlfriend admitted, she was quite shocked when she saw me in swimming trunks for the first time. Apparently, my shirt choice covered the fat rolls very well.
Anyway, I was able to do things I loved with my body, like swimming and cycling, without too much effort, so I never really cared enough to cut on weight. And I decided that I am a water person, and all gravity infested sports on land were not made for me.
Fast forward to my third child, when I put on weight during pregnancy without giving birth then, so never lost it easily. My scale shouted 95kg in my face, and I was not able to bend sidewards because of fat rolls. This was enough to have me diet (as you know) to excess, lose 10kg in 10 weeks and take up running. I hated it though. The epiphany of a fun run took half a year of practicing a very slow jog twice a week for 30 minutes very late in the evening where nobody had to witness my ordeal.
Running more and more had me also shed weight, but I struggled with a good, healthy eating. It was either all or nothing. Well, a big lot or very little. I never really reached a stable behavior, but always struggled. Running around 200 miles per month then had me burn enough calories to eat whatever I wanted and not gain weight. This was great for the glutton in me. But very bad for my diet. I could keep this amount of training for about half a year and it gifted me the nicest, easiest, long runs and races ever. Soreness after the Brocken-Challenge? No. Running hundred miles and carrying a kid down the stairs without using the handrail the next day? Piece of cake. I really miss those times.
While pure dieting and a little jogging had me lose the first 10kg, I began to read about getting rid of body fat and got sucked in the universe of body builders who always try to balance a maximum of protein intake and a minimum of calories so the body will not be able to store any reserves. Of course, I also began some sort of weight training. Body weight in the first place. Mostly at home, some at work in a abandoned hall where some heavy equipment could be moved from left to right and the old crane was a good bar for pull ups. I did this whenever the cravings for food became too much to bare. This had my get my weight down to 78kg with a body fat of around 6%. I also tried the training site/app 2peaks that I got recommended by Bernie who supported me big time those days. When putting in my personal data, I got a note that the ideal body weight of a long distance runner of 1.84m height was about 73.5kg. Whoa. So, even with the 78kg I always felt like I needed to shed more weight in order to run better. And of course, every kg counts when you run. Going down from 80 to 78kg was a direct increase of performance by 2.5%. Try to reach that increase by training… Of course, this is only true of the two kg that are gone were entirely useless body fat. So for Brocken-Challenge 2016, I made an attempt to get lighter and reached 76kg with a strong diet again. Only, as I learned later, not all body fat is useless, superfluous. But for example the subskin-fat is a vital part in the immune system. Turned out, I weakened my body too much with the diet that I got sick with a cold a week before the race and had fever on race day.
So, I dropped the idea to get very light for running and tried to get comfortable where I was. And I also wanted to eat dessert again. For some years, I weighed in around 82kg which was still a weight I could carry through hundred milers, but the blob above the navel grew back. Yes, it was gone for a while, a thing that made me very, very happy and proud. Also the fact that less body weight and stronger legs had me leave a chair without effort in an instant. This meant so much freedom for me.
Then came the Blerch (see https://theoatmeal.com/), I ran less and ate more, self betrayal at its best that this would work out. I saw the scale climbing again. Figured, as long as I could run well, this is not a problem, and getting more and more into my old habits to stuff my face with whatever there is, mostly sweets. Ask my colleagues, there is hardly a time where I don’t have something to eat in my hand at my desk. I tried to lower my weight before significant races, but never really managed to. I ran the dreaded Brocken-Challenge last year with 88kg. And a partly ruptured calf. No fun. Then came the JUNUT. I was not fit for that race. But as it was cancelled at 80k in the year before, I had to do it. For the yellow jacket. For my quest to learn how far I can go. So I did it, overweight, undertrained, coming out of an injury. And I finished. So proud! But the tingling feeling in my feet the last 20k were less my macerated skin but nerves in the mid foot I pinched. It took three months to regrow the nerves so I could feel my middle toes again, to know if they are laying correctly in the shoe or if some is crossing its neighbor. Some severe pain in the middle foot had me fear a fatigue fracture. Got an xray right before our hike across the Alps and apparently, its not a fracture but Morton’s neuroma. Sigh. Sometimes painful, but harmless. In my book.
But all this had me not run for a very long time. I even lost all routine. So, I had many, many attempts to get into running again from fall last year, and every time there was something preventing me to get into a rhythm again. Silvester should have been another attempt to start with some short runs, only the house we stayed at was so infested with mites that I could not even climb stairs without my asthma spray. Another week with Cortisone spray followed and then I finally ran a bit here and there. Always the 80k in my head that I of course wanted to finish again. Without the pain from last year. Only, I weighed in at 92kg, sometimes even a bit more. My legs, muscles, joints and tendonds complained a lot. And I got out of breath easily. Had to start very, very slowly, and usually made it to the point where my lungs opened up. Sometimes not. Then I kept the initial crawl and retracted home like a beaten dog.
As Jan and Bernd who would stay at my place and run the Brocken-Challenge with me, also complained a lot about missing training, I felt in much better company. I heard and loved the song “Immer noch drauf” by Lumpenpack one of Jule’s favourite bands at the moment. They describe in the first verse the start of a running race with little training and a bigger belly. This became kind of the hymn for this race. Listen here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8tLQ3GstIQk
Brocken-Challenge 2024, here we go!
Ok, let’s get to the point. In the last week up to the race, I did not do any harm to my calves, even though I ran faster than what’s wise on my last training run on Thursday. But finally, sub 6min/km felt effortless. 5:30 still manageable. 5:00 possible without getting in a spiral of breathlessness. I reworked the slides for the briefing a bit here and there, put in the photos from Markus, Michael and Christoph who got up all the turn signs on Thursday. I made plans when the kids would come over to meet Jan and Bernd, arranged my backpack of dry clothes and towel to be sent up the Brocken, and it was Friday afternoon in the blink of an eye. There was a little adrenaline rush when I learned that there is none of the usual house technicians and I was supposed to not have my laptop in the front to show the route. But we managed with a telephone joker to have everything in place at 18:00. Even the slide about the Braunschweig-Goettingen-Challenge, a jubilee run end of May which is a must for me as it connects my two home towns. And because I made the route 😉 But 135k in May? Phew.
Anyway, the briefing was nice as ever. I loved the pushing sound of Markus and his Leon, even though they did not really match the meditative mood of the slide show of old race photos and (de-)motivationals that we show before the actual briefing. When I packed my stuff, helped one or two people with luggage problems, we wanted to get some pasta, but they ran out because so many people did not register, but ate anyway. Ooops, I did not register as well, so we hopped in the cars (thanks Bernd for taking my bike with us) and went home to have our own pasta party.
We set up the beds, ate some macaroni and aglio i olio, and were joined by Tom who wanted to spend the night at my place as well to witness the start as he does every year. Packing the race pack, sorting running clothes, stuffing on beet root, the usual routine. This time with Bernd, a nice addition to the team. We dropped to bed a little too late, set the alarm to 4 am, and tried to sleep. I could not. Too much adrenaline. Anxiety? Maybe. I turned left to right and back. Sometimes got fully awake in the idea to not have set an alarm. Pre-race routine. At some point, the alarm sounded for real, we got up, had proper breakfast and hopped in the car.
I wanted to be there early, to not have to find a wonky parking spot. And we managed, sat in the car for another 20 minutes and talked. Finally got out in the ‘cold’ of the morning and signed in. Even though I had a successful bathroom visit at home, something began to move and I had to retract in the forest for a dump. Gladly, I could borrow Bernd’s headlamp, as I did not take one. Got this over with and joined the others at the camp fire, say hello to Tanya and some more familiar faces when we realized Markus began his talk on the iconic start rock. So we hurried over, some last hugs with Tom and off we were.
It was really warm. For February. 9 DegC at the start. Should go down to 0 at the summit in the night, but winds would make it feel like 5DegC below zero. I had quite some warm clothes in my pack not to suffer the same warmth deficit as last year, this time without hope of being rescued by Stefanie who had a seminar that weekend. I took poles. Also a lesson learned from last year. Those might have saved me big time with my calf. The only vest to really carry the cheat sticks was the big one I used on my Harz adventure, the Chiemgauer100 and the JUNUT. So, no bladder to fill, but two bottles in the front and much more space to load unnecessary stuff. I tried to not excess this time and somehow managed. I wore long tights, short trail Injinis, the common boxers, gaiters, Superior 3.5 that got me through the JUNUT with little toe damage, the TU shirt and the Brocken Marathon longsleeve that is my best option since 2013 when I need covered arms. A buff on the head and that is it. Ah, no. I wore gloves at the start that went into the vest pretty quickly after the start.
We hobbled through the Goettingen forest with all the others, not passing as many as in former years, but still working through the field after passing the gate rather late. Somewhere in the mud Jan and I had lost Bernd. Which was a pity as I wanted to wish him good luck on his first attempt on 80k. He is a marathoner, and below. But sometimes we can convince him to try longer, like at the Katzensprung where he reached 73k. On a level concrete bike path. Let’s see what mud and elevation do to him.
On the drop to Mackenrode I wanted to let it roll as always. And Jan kept up. We passed Sanna who would be somewhere around us all day. I kept back to talk a bit with her and Jan went off. It got lighter and lighter and on the climb after Landolfshausen, I finally got him again. We ran along the Seulinger Warte, down to the Seeburger See and talked. This is one of the few occasions through the year where we really get to exchange what’s going on in each others life. I love that. We were just a little to fast. I had several anxious glances at my watch, 5:20, 5:30… This was not good. But also common in this stretch of the BC. And it was downhill. So we ran. And I had to push to keep up. Yes, Jan is in better shape even though he trained less than me. But he did not put on weight, as far as I know.
We passed the lake, worked through Ruedeshausen, passed the worlds best garden and some more runners and rolled into the second aid station with a grin, but also sweaty and out of breath. Aschu was a welcome sight there, Jan needed to tape a toe and was quicker than I could down a cup of tea. Wow. Grabbed another snack and pushed on to finally leave the asphalt and get traily. I had to get something out of my shoe and off was Jan again on the climb up to the Kapelle and through Rhumspringe. I worked my way to the Rhumequelle, got caught by Sanna and took my time at the aid station. Last year, I was quitting at this point. Not today. They even brought out the cheese cake right before I wanted to leave, so I stayed for a few pieces, and had Jan disappear on the uphill.
Around here I noticed a new kind of pain, chafing in a spot I never had it before. Yes, my tights have the tendency to slide down my leg so my inner thighs rub against each other, the more I weigh, the more I need to make sure the pants are up and there is only fabric on fabric friction. But now the chafing was more on the back of my legs, right below the buttocks. Darn. I pulled the pants up quite often, but this had no real effect on that rubbing. I figured it cannot be that bad, but at some point, I gave in, took out the bag balm and relubed. Also those spots. This helped a bit, but the damage was already done. Lateron, under the shower, I learned that my buttocks were really hanging down producing a skin fold. Argh! Age or weight? I don’t know and I don’t care, I just don’t want this to be. Another thing that reminded me of all the futile attempts to lose weight. Meh.
I did not really want to push, we had already overdone this part on the first quarter of the race. Sigh. So I walked up the forest road, finished drinking and eating, got out the poles again and worked my way uphill. Running was not so much fun, but as there was a hill, I was fine with that. Some people around me triggered some sort of competitiveness in me, so I ran the downhills, the flats and even the slightly uphill parts, as in my book poles make this possible. It was really hard work. Every now and then, I saw Jan in the distance. He was pretty close after the Einsiedlerhof, but pulled away again on the rolling hills leading to Barbis. My quest to walk only ‘steeper’ uphills came to an end when I passed the tractor exhibition and reached the long long road through Barbis. Someone else in front of me also walked, so I took this as an excuse to not push anymore, until I got bored with the sidewalk and grumpily hobbled along and down to the aid station.
There were many cheering people. Not only here in Barbis, where this is a common thing that friends meet their runners at the halfway point and give applause to everyone else as well. But also on the rest of the way, we had many people giving some nice words. Only one guy somehow put up music at every intersection he was waiting for his runner, who apparently had a similar pace than me. At the Seeburger See, this was some very awful Schlager, in Rollshausen, it was at least HBloxx, but somehow it did not go well with the silence along the entire way. We had nature’s sounds and our feet. I even felt bad for the clicking of my poles. Yes, there were many runners wearing headphones, but for me the music was always some kind of disturbance. And at the same intersections there was always Christoph, who could not run this year, as he was ill, but he decided to support Michael, who was always a bit behind me but the final stretch. Christoph always made sure we saw that he had no business with the music, but I somehow thought they were sharing a ride. But no. Just coincidence of their runners’ speed.
Entering the Harz was again an attempt to be carried along by others as I tried to not have Martin and Lisa pull away who passed me when I got another stone out of my shoe. A tad before Wasserscheide, I could no longer keep up and had them pull away, only to see that they were taking longer walking breaks too. Not on the downhill for me. And the Steinaer Tal is not really steep. So I got into a grind to ‘run’ as long as was manageable without my heart rate shooting up, then walk until the next landmark I set when starting to walk. Only, I found myself to find something interesting, to take a photo, read a sign, whatever, only to miss the point to start running again. Darn subconsciousness…
At Barbis, I refilled one of my bottles with the remaining container when they had to make new tea. Turned out, this was salty. And not really broth or anything, but warm salt water? Ugh! And just that morning I told Jan and Bernd about my discovery of how good a nauseant warm salt water is when I tried to fill on salt right before a training run on a day of eating sweets. I tried to avoid that right bottle, but tried it every now and then, as I could not really imagine that they gave out salt water. I have to investigate on that… Much later, coming up to Lausebuche, I finally emptied that bottle and had it filled with proper tea. Phew.
And I found Jan again. Made a push. And right before I would reach him, there was a runner coming down the valley and I figured this was Aschu, who went up from the Oderstausee to see some old friends on the route he gave the briefing for so many times until I took this over from him. He turned and we walked together, all three, to the Jagdkopf. This was a fun distraction. At the VP, I fell into a chair, got a blanket and had my bottle filled with tea over and over, got a bottle of coke, and whatever I could reach on the table. Really good were the marshmallows. I’d never taken them as race nutrition in the store, but here I was picking all of them out of the mix and was really glad to have found something that worked, as my stomach signaled some dissatisfaction since Barbis.
Jan was looking really miserably, and walked off and I was sure, I’d reach him in an instant once I got out of my chair. But he was gone. Kai left the aid station together with me and we exchanged some words, even though I did not really feel like talking at that moment. So I pulled away on the longer slight downhill and tried to stay ahead, ha. Did not work out in the end, but made for some ‘fast’ kms in that second Entsafter. Every once in a while I could see Jan on the long stretches ahead, but lost any will to torture myself, only to have him pull away again. At the Lausebuche I took some time with the soup, another bottle of coke and Haferschnitte. Filled my bottles and walked on. I still had the intent to run anything downhill and this kind of worked out. But my quads were already very stiff and the knees started to hurt. I used the poles by putting more and more weight on them, only to find my elbows complain where the tendons attach. Sigh. On the flats I ran as much as I could, which was not much. Had some people pass me. They were all much wiser to not push initially, so they got plenty in the tank here on the many uphills.
I directed one other struggling guy over the dangerous road in Koenigskrug and there we were at the second to last aid station. I made sure to tell them that they made a good job (as I always do, but those were running an aid station for the first time, and did not have much reference) and went on, in the intent to get this thing over with soon. When I was 50m along the road, I heard a familiar voice ‘Nummer 8’, Tanya reached the aid station as well. I like to run with her, but traditionally, I am much faster than her. Not this time. Not with all the weight I carry and the little training I managed. Again, I pushed, did not want to get caught. Angrily walked up the very long hill after Koenigskrug, not without shouting someone in the correct direction who was about to run the spanish round to Oderbrueck downtown. I even got him down the correct path to Oderbrueck (sorry for the wrong hint in the briefing, it’s not possible to see the powerlines at that intersection, I apologize for that!) and we hobbled through the swamp which usually is covered by ice and snow. This time we got wet feet. And caught Michael, who made sure to make it through with dry feet, which took him way longer. I love the food the Matzkes put on in Oderbrueck. So I stayed for a bit longer, chatted, filled up with tea and coke again, and ate quite some russische Zupftorte.
Then Tanya came flying through. ‘It’s running so well, I cannot stop now…’ and off were both my plans to stay ahead and to finish in well known company. I made an attempt to get her, but had to face it, she was faster than me. I could not catch up. Too much weight on too little training… Another woman was in between us who made funny bursts of really fast running with her poles but only for a few tens of steps. I figured she was chasing Tanya, but later saw Marcel already coming down the hill and exchanging some words with Tanya and then applauding that woman who jumped aside and he apologized big time. Apparently, she was not part of the party. When he reached me, he simply turned around and went up again. As we talked about this and that it dawned on me that he did not change his mind about the direction, but simply did not want me to need to stop to talk. Very attentive. And very mush my brain at that time. I went on, passed said woman and worked up to the Brockenbahn. Never ever was this section as long and steep when there was snow. There really was no end. I remembered when I had my four day Harz adventure and saw this road without snow for the first time (actually, I must have seen it during the BC reverse in summer back in the days, but that was down!) and did not recognize it the slightest bit. Up at the railroad tracks, I was completely alone. Felt like the last man on earth, or at least the last person in the long line of runners. I was actually glad when two younglings (not by the number of years but their effortlessness) passed me and disappeared in the fog.
I then met Marina with kid and partner and Christoph. Another good time, nice words and no intention to push myself. The end of the tracks could have come sooner, but I had a stop to record a passing train for Tom, then turned to Brockenstrasse and decided that all people around me have to endure the pole clicking now. I went up in a solid walking pace and passed a group of young guys, kind of where I would choose the other side of the street. But they were done by the uphill and asked me if I was up here before, and I told them that this is my nineth edition of the Brocken-Challenge, but all they wanted to know was how long they have to climb still. Maybe they thought I did the climb nine times that day? I don’t know and don’t really care.
Up at the station, a train was just rolling in. When I briefly saw one earlier making it’s way up the Brocken when I was in Koenigskrug, I had the idea to make a photo and blame the train for the fog on the summit. But here I was totally in the fog and the train did not push out any steam as it was just rolling into the station by it’s momentum. Sigh. I made a video anyway, another reason to stop for a while.
Then there was no more delaying of a finish, and I went up the last few meters. The finish crew made a very good job in acoustically marking the finish area. One guy was constantly rotating this loud Knarre. When they saw me, some Partytroeten joined and I was finally there. Made the tour to the Brockenstein and had a cyclist take a few photos. Then quickly into the warmth. The stairs were really horrible. But I managed, found Jan after some seconds of disorientation and tried to make some room on the floor for all my stuff.
The rest was routine. A very nice routine. Kind of why I do this thing over and over. The warm shower, treating my chafing with zinc ointment, getting food and drinks with minimizing the steps on the stiff legs. Chatting here and there, enjoying the afterglow, and the dry and warm clothes. And that I did not have to run on. And not think about the way down. Getting a bit anxious when and if Bernd will arrive here. Applauding many many people who reached the Goethesaal after me. Sorting all my stuff. Sending finish photos.
And then Bernd came. It was Tanya who saw him first and joyfully shouted ‘Bernd!’ through the hall. It made me really happy to see him up here in good spirits. And he was walking without a limp or anything. He made a really smooth impression. Wow. More food, drinks, finally a massage by Rado. More people reaching their finish and the day came to an end. Tanya was a bit nervous to not make it down to the bus in time, so she started a tad early and we followed with the last bunch of people. Out into the ‘cold’ darkness was a bit harsh in the beginning and I was glad to have taken my expedition down jacket. And poles. I definitely needed them. Although the massage was really good, my quads were still quite stiff when stepping down. The Rampe down from the Brockenbahn was painful. But company was nice and we just trotted down, had a few moments in the Hochmoorbaude and when Markus came, we hobbled to the bus and were brought safely back to the start. Another really nice adventurous day on the route of the Brocken-Challenge is in the books.
Lauf of my Life 